Wednesday, January 18, 2017

New Revelations Add to the Collection of Mysteries in Roswell, 1947


Wherein We Meet Patient-X and an Angry Little Man 
"Flying Saucers Piss Me Off!"

For the sake of other patients' privacy, the "Santa Fe long term care facility" once responsible for housing the man we call Patient-X has expressed its desire to remain unidentified throughout the course of this narrative. For the sake of the same privacy accorded to other patients, they have also requested that Patient-X's real name not be released. Given that the very few surviving members of his family have also proven hostile to the idea of publicizing their familial connection to this individual, The Saucerologist has agreed to maintain a state of anonymity in return for access to records and memories that were previously impossible to examine. For those attempting to track Patient-X down by the use of clever hints and context delivered in part by The Saucerologist, who some people seem to think is a complete idiot who doesn't understand the background and the presumably overlooked application of location! Location! LOCATION!, the long term care facility discussed in this series of articles is also anonymous in relation to its natural place in the universe (so live with it dear, vocabulary pickers). As understood by all three editors of The Saucerologist, there is not now, nor has there ever been, such a medical facility as that described in these few pages anywhere near the city of Santa Fe, New Mexico. To give this series of articles the necessary conditions of locality demanded of such narratives, we have determined to maintain this illusory quality throughout. Obviously, such a facility does exist within the United States, and it was, at one time, responsible for housing the comatose individual we have elected to call "Patient-X". While our readers are certainly welcome to look for it, The Saucerologist is confident, given the current desires of both the facility and the family, that no such attempt will reach a successful conclusion until the above conditions no longer exist.

The conversations as presented in the article below have been recreated from the recollections of Ardajio Jonas, video files recorded on a cell phone owned by Ardajio Jonas, archived recordings currently maintained at a long term care facility outside of Santa Fe, New Mexico, private documents held by Patient-X's few remaining family members, and the contents of private emails that were accidentally stored on a non-affiliated server, thereby allowing independent contractors to examine their contents, most of which were trivial, with the remainder serving primarily as a means to confirm a number of claims originally addressed by other sources.

SPI SANTA FE NM -- For 46 years a quiet secret was watched and fretted over by three generations of care givers at a coma ward hospital outside of Santa Fe, standing isolated and sun-bleached amongst the barren hills and the brutalized landscape of northern New Mexico. The identity of this secret was originally discussed -- if discussed at all -- as "Patient-X", and up until the summer of 1993, Patient-X had been comatose and cared for longer than any other human being in recorded history.

Ardajio Jonas, a Veteran's Administration representative who was attached in an "informal" capacity to the Santa Fe facility in 1993, became interested in the case and conducted his own investigation, primarily to satisfy his own curiosity. "I didn't have much to do anyway; it's not like all of those people needed advice or had any questions that needed some urgent answering." He was able to eventually gain access to the original documentation in regard to the man's commitment, and was surprised to learn that he had originally been treated at a small clinic on the old army base at Roswell, New Mexico. Those documents went a long way to explaining exactly how he wound up at the facility in Santa Fe.

According to Jonas, his medical history as a comatose individual started out as a death watch. When Patient-X "failed to stabilize those first six weeks at the clinic on the old army base at Roswell, New Mexico, nobody at all expected him to live longer than a few weeks at best. In those days, and we're talking about the summer of 1947, there really wasn't much social pressure involved in the decision as to whether or not someone should be removed from life supporting systems. Wasn't at all like today. There just wasn't much to it, and those systems in use were so primitive compared to what we've got now, that social pressure, whatever your belief, just didn't happen. There simply wasn't anything to argue about, because there was no substantive issue involved. You either died or you lived, period. Things are a whole lot different now ..." Remarkably, Patient-X was still alive 46 years later, and nobody from Roswell to Santa Fe would have ever guessed at such a resolution.

"That old boy must have had God on his side that summer, 'cause he was one of the very few who lived. And, of course, he continued to do so, even though it took him a bit of time to settle into it. It's unsurprising, really, that it also took a little time to pull out of that coma. It must have been a Hell of a thing to witness his awakening, once it got started and all, but that's one of those little miracles they'd never let an admin frog like me hang around for. Only doctors and nursing staff got in, which was pretty damn ironic, really, given that his condition became so precarious so immediately once he started showing signs that there was something new going on in his head.

"For a good two weeks in February of 1993, he started having these awful seizures -- long and drawn out, like a slow leak in a swimming pool; you don't even notice the water level dropping until you realize the chlorine level is starting to burn your eyes a little more than usual. They just weren't ordinary seizures, y'know? Most folks have a seizure longer than 40, 50-seconds, and it's an alarm goin' off, 'cause that's a long, long time. But he was havin' these seizures that lasted a half hour or more! Even worse, the doctors couldn't figure out what was goin' on. This was truly a bad, bad time, and everybody was pretty certain that he was fixin' to die. When you're talkin' about a person's health, the only odds that doctors can go on is based on history. How long do most people in such circumstances go on? What happens to the brain when you start seizing up like that when you're in a coma?

"The thing is, there ain't much history to go on when you've been in storage for almost fifty years -- there's just no precedent for it, and nobody really knows what 50-years of unconsciousness is going to do to a man's brain, his nervous system -- Hell, even his lower functions, all that automated stuff like breathing or getting rid of the waste and poisons that a man can absorb over the years without even knowing it. It was uncharted territory, so you couldn't really tell what was going on upstairs. You couldn't plan for it either. But I'll tell you, when those eyes of his started fluttering and then snapped open like somebody had pegged a switch, those doctors had to have been shocked. After 46-years or so of darkness, not a single one of them was thinkin' about recovery. Every doctor and a good ninety-percent of the nursing staff expected him to die in the shadows without ever waking up. It was just gonna be lights out, and he had been in that lights out state since 1947 when he was still being treated at the little clinic they used to have at the Army Air Field in Roswell. In those days, they still had a little bit of hope that he might regain his wits a little. Yeah... that hope didn't last too long at all.

"He was moved outta Roswell years and years ago and put in cold storage right here in Santa Fe. They were nowhere near properly equipped enough to keep him just lyin' about there in that little clinic they had. They moved him up here and locked him away. And then, for no apparent reason at all, he started to get a little more ... a little more ... active. The seizures came and the seizures went, and that's about when his chances of living through that waking up stage started to get particularly bad. He started cramping up at times, and archived records show that over the course of eleven days, his heart stopped eighteen times. He did a lot of drifting in and out of this organic fugue state, but it was all internal. You couldn't really tell what was going on from the outside. Every once in a while someone might see a muscle flutter that could have been the wind, had he been takin' a nap out in the grass. It was all just drifting. For the most part, folks just assumed that he was gonna drift on out, that his body was gonna catch up with the rest of him that was already dead and gone. Hell, it was long, long gone."


Patient-X was eventually moved from
Roswell to a coma ward in Santa Fe
Doctors insist that it was Patient-X's age that made his continued survival so extremely doubtful. The odds of his remaining alive dropped away to almost nothing as soon as he started to regain consciousness, and that process alone took over 6-weeks. "You can imagine how stoked up everyone was. They kept a real close eye on him, 'cause when you get to that point, presence alone can fix blame. I truly hate saying this, but just about every lawsuit those coma docs are forced to deal with comes about 'cause of somethin' they did during the awakening. Now I'm sure they spent so much time and effort helping that old boy 'cause they genuinely wanted to help him and do whatever they could for him, but they also put a lot of attention on the line 'cause that's where you screw up most and that's how you end up in court. In a way, it was good for me, too, 'cause it meant that every little thing was recorded and set down as history. An' not being a doctor, it was the human story that interested me the most, y'know?"

Once that awakening process stabilized somewhat, and Patient-X could be described at least half the time as "conscious", he dropped right down into something the doctors described as "a continuously failing state" for about five-and-a-half months, and nobody at the hospital expected him to hang on much longer than that. Most of the staff shared the opinion that his lifespan was something of a miracle that became more alarming with each day of consciousness.

"It was all very sad," Ardajio Jonas admitted. "Most of his life, he was in a coma, and when he finally wasn't, the whole awakening process was most likely gonna kill him. Eventually, of course, that's what happened. The awakening killed him. Well, more specifically, his advanced age combined with the horrifying physical condition that 46 years in a comatose state had left behind killed him. His death sentence became a fact of life as soon as consciousness slipped in." It was a cruel judgment that Jonas described, but it couldn't be helped. "Mercy is one of those aspects of human life that has no real place in a long term care facility. It's a luxury no one can afford, because the job is to wake the inmates up, not euthanize them once they start sensing that the world around them actually exists.

The patient's condition was the primary reason that his eventual care and treatment was so different to that accorded to most coma patients. From day one, he couldn't participate in any except the most basic physical therapy exercises that require the very least measure of effort. It was believed with some authority that the standard physical effort required for successful therapy would kill him very quickly. None of it was kept secret from him, of course. That would have been so unethical that most of the staff would have refused to participate in such a strategic retreat from human dignity. All the same, it wasn't a subject anyone cared to dwell on, and that included Patient-X.

While some remarkable advances in medical care came about as a result of World War Two and its influx of badly wounded soldiers requiring treatment, not enough had been learned about keeping a human body alive after it has dropped off the scope of human consciousness. All they could really do at the time was watch it, keep it clean, prevent or treat the bed sores that tend to develop, and make sure enough nutrients were being absorbed to prevent infection. As for the vegetative states that encompass most modern discussions of comatose individuals, the medical communities worldwide didn't even understand how best to define the issue. They couldn't measure the whole spectrum electrical activity in the brain, and they lacked the knowledge to define its importance. If the body could breathe on its own, the assumption was that it could recover on its own. The primary medical duty was to prevent infection and starvation, and a lot of the time all they had to go on was muscle cramps and body fluids.

Patient-X was a medical disaster when he was discovered in June 1947 just outside the perimeter of the Army base at Roswell, New Mexico. A single, anonymous phone call had alerted the military about his presence. One side of his skull had been crushed, his pelvis was shattered like it was glass in more than a couple of places, and both of his legs were hideously mangled, one of which was very nearly snapped off at the knee like a twig of dry kindling. He was already comatose when security personnel attached to the Army base discovered his body, but his wounds had also been cleaned and dressed. Although the effort was obviously substantial, it was far from being the treatment he would have received at a hospital, or even for that matter, from someone properly trained to administer first aid. As a result, infection had already set within his broken leg, and it later required amputation.


Braceros were "shamefully neglected"
Over the course of the next three weeks, some great efforts were made to establish his identity. This eventually resulted in the successful identification of the young man by his employer, who supplied contract labor to farming interests in New Mexico, Utah, and Arizona. Patient-X had been hired to pick up and transport across the border 10 Mexican Braceros, or common laborers, who had been contracted at 30-cents an hour -- a wage guaranteed through the Mexican Farm Labor Agreement of 1942. The agreement between the U.S. and Mexico was intended to fill the holes in a number of labor intensive professions, primarily harvesting crops or working associated jobs such as cleaning and packing. Braceros were necessary to fill labor needs still recovering from the massive labor shortage that numerous industries suffered as a result of World War Two. Patient-X was employed to drive a produce truck to the U.S. border with Mexico where he was supposed to pick up ten already contracted Braceros and drive them to Albuquerque, New Mexico. Once there, they would be met by drivers from one of three farm interests already prepared to provide employment, bed, and two meals a day until the end of October. Due to the markets' "straddling" of western states, most of these Braceros were likely to be picked up for labor contracts in other industries, or at another of the privatized farm interests and would not be sent back to Mexico until January or so, if at all. Many would simply stay in communal camp areas, where they could be expected to pick up additional contracts in the Spring. Unsurprisingly, some of the Braceros were fated to die. Only this last eventuality would be ignored by both the U.S. government and the farming interests who profited from this ready-made labor force. Death, for the most part, was hardly noticed throughout the turning of a day.

In 1956, labor organizer Ernesto Galarza’s book Stranger in Our Fields was published, drawing attention for the first time to the conditions experienced by Braceros. The book begins with this statement from one of the Mexican laborers: “In this camp, we have no names. we are called only by numbers.” Galarza concluded that the Braceros were lied to, cheated and “shamefully neglected." The U.S. Department of Labor officer in charge of the program, Lee G. Williams, described it as a system of “legalized slavery,” proving that the issue of Mexican laborers in America is far more complex than most Americans are wont to believe and suffers from roots far deeper than those recognized in America today.

American icon Woodie Guthrie's take on the issue, reprinted below, has been judged by history as a far more striking and effective measure of the malignancy that has since developed within our two cultures. Too many Americans seem to have forgotten the invitations that one nation extended to another, thereby fostering a migratory system that to at least some extent still exists and oppresses to this day.

The crops are all in and the peaches are rott'ning,
The oranges piled in their creosote dumps;
They're flying 'em back to the Mexican border
To pay all their money to wade back again

Goodbye to my Juan, goodbye, Rosalita,
Adios mis amigos, Jesus y Maria;
You won't have your names when you ride the big airplane,
All they will call you will be "deportees"

My father's own father, he waded that river,
They took all the money he made in his life;
My brothers and sisters come working the fruit trees,
And they rode the truck till they took down and died.

Some of us are illegal, and some are not wanted,
Our work contract's out and we have to move on;
Six hundred miles to that Mexican border,
They chase us like outlaws, like rustlers, like thieves.

We died in your hills, we died in your deserts,
We died in your valleys and died on your plains.
We died 'neath your trees and we died in your bushes,
Both sides of the river, we died just the same.

The sky plane caught fire over Los Gatos Canyon,
A fireball of lightning, and shook all our hills,
Who are all these friends, all scattered like dry leaves?
The radio says, "They are just deportees"

Is this the best way we can grow our big orchards?
Is this the best way we can grow our good fruit?
To fall like dry leaves to rot on my topsoil
And be called by no name except "deportees"?


Many Braceros never made it home 
The above text represents what was intended to be an exorcism of American labor that has always thrived on Mexican sweat and Washington plutocracy. Written by Woody Guthrie, Deportee (Plane Wreck at Los Gatos), commemorates the horrific loss of 28 Braceros who were being repatriated to Mexico in January 1948. Numbers equally high died during similar transportive incidents using buses, trucks, cars, and, in at least one case recorded in southern Texas, a hot air balloon that was recklessly packed with 14 Braceros. These incidents, of course, record only those entirely legal attempts to deport inexpensive labor from those inexpensive labor camps where the contracts these men had bargained for were inevitably shredded by American overseers who demanded that new contracts be drafted. The arguments in favor of the rewritten contract rule was a hard one to refuse: "well, you boys can either bargain out a new contract, or you can be arrested as illegal migrant workers and sent home." That cute phrase "bargain out" actually meant "boy, you shut the Hell up and put your X right there" when it was translated into American-pidgin-Spanish.

Today, millions of Mexican-Americans can trace their families' initial arrival into the United States to their fathers' or grandfathers' employment as Braceros. This program -- the largest foreign worker program in U.S. history -- would eventually invite and employ men and women from every state across the nation of Mexico until 1964, when it was finally discontinued by the Democrats in an American Congress that had previously danced to a Republican chorus more concerned with cheap labor than a secure border. For 22-years, business concerns throughout the country had contracted for and utilized the labor the Braceros were more than willing to supply, given the economical climate forced upon the nation of Mexico by an American business doctrine that had assumed ownership of everything in the western hemisphere, including its population. This was an attitude that would eventually result in some terrible abuses to American security, Mexican sovereignity, an economical system that applauded and rewarded labor practices and an ever evolving protocol that represented and retained the closest thing to slavery that either nation had been subjected to since the Reconstruction era, and the contemptible and irrepresable shame that was part and parcel to the unjustifiable burden of racial prejudice, hatred, and blame suffered by latinos ever since.


Braceros were routinely humiliated
The Bracero Program, of course, did not become an immediate process of ruination and despair. For the most part, national desperation is difficult to achieve between equal parties. Prostration -- even if it's merely symbolic -- requires submission, and the political climate capable of cooling later conversations had not yet reached that point of severe imbalance necessary to enable criminal acts under the guise of perceived dominance to thrive so readily. Horror needs to be worked into a story over the space of time and activity, especially on an international level. In a field of nations, a certain measure of control is always necessary to avoid war once the gravy chain of malevolence starts to gather speed. Without the prostration described by one nation's submission to another, the complete control necessary to prevent the suffering of strangers from sounding too much like the agony of friends has no place to take root. In 1947, the submission required simply didn't exist. Mexico, you see, was still in a position to make demands that the United States was openly forced to both recognize and to satisfy. Mexico's feud with the State of Texas belongs in this category of international negotiation.

When the sovereign nation of Mexico very publically refused to accept any contracting of its citizens by businesses and individuals located in the State of Texas, they were responding, for the most part, to a plethora of racially motivated insults that were common in America. It was believed throughout Mexico, for what are sound and convincing reasons, that those American citizens who lived in Texas, and indeed, the State of Texas itself, was typically prejudicial and abusive in its treatment of Mexicans and had been for the past century. Given the extent of farming interests within Texas during World War Two, this refusal to contract with businesses associated with or based within the State of Texas tended to be responsible for some very real economic damage within the United States, most explicitly within the State of Texas itself. The governor was forced to adopt a very active role in the efforts to convince Mexico that its citizenry would be safe in Texas, and would be treated with the care and respect they deserved as hard-working guests of the United States. Having been lied to repeatedly, Mexico was understandably doubtful and openly questioned both the motivation and the sincerity of these "promises to be good and worthy neighbors" that Texans were now so openly affirming. These insistent pleas for friendship were bracketed by the sincerity and the urgency expressed by federal interests in Washington, DC, without which Mexican Braceros would have very likely ignored the steadily increasing desparation behind the pleas and promises of interests within the State of Texas. It was apparent that 1947 was expected to be a watershed year for international relations.

The fact that the whole Bracero Program was originally intended to end when the war ended seemed to have been forgotten by both nations when World War Two actually ended. There were some very good reasons for this, just as there were some very bad reasons that nobody really wanted to discuss at the time, a characteristic of international diplomacy that still exists today, primarily within the consistent refusal of the United States Congress to even debate the issue, while simultaneously insisting that something has to be done. It's an unfailing sign of the hypocrisy of political demand that has been well and truly employed for decades in Washington, DC.

Repeatedly since 1942, the Immigration and Naturalization Service very publicly extended the time limits allowable for Mexican Braceros to remain in America under the same agreements and treaties already negotiated with our great neighbor to the south. This was considered necessary, it was agreed, to proactively control the border regions in the southwest. They wanted to take advantage of this federally-sanctioned, labor-based program as the best means to control both Mexican immigration and possible border incursion. The Bracero Program had become something of a cause celebre amongst those seeking a more robust immigration policy and system of border control. Unfortunately, the Bracero Program also enabled American contractors to skirt the issue of immigration entirely by simply refusing to honor the contracts that had already been established.

The Mexicans were still paid, of course, but oftentimes only a fraction of the wages they had been promised, and that the United States had previously guaranteed. You would think that during the state of such a tense and irrefutable war footing, American pride and patriotism would have counted for something, some expression of honesty to an economic and spiritual ally of the United States. Sweet dreams, right? Yeah ... but not so much where money is concerned. The large farming interests that provided much of that pay were not idiots. The wages they offered were all too often retained until the contracts were fulfilled. And that's when "mistakes" can happen. Those "mistakes" sometimes forced Braceros to remain in the United States, moving from farm to farm or migrating to the larger cities for more lucrative employment. Those who did leave would often return the following season to earn the same deflated wages.

This pattern was maintained throughout the war, and had three very closely associated consequences: (1) American farmers got into the habit of paying for seasonal, Mexican labor at a rate that was far lower than anything they could possibly negotiate with American farm workers returning from Europe and the Far East; (2) U.S. government officials were persuaded by those hiring the Braceros to maintain that status quo throughout the war; and (3), because of the first two consequences, Mexican government officials found themselves continuously in conflict with American Immigration and Naturalization Service personnel, angrily lobbying for America to honor its treaty commitments and international obligations to pay the Mexican laborers the wages they were promised, to give them proper housing and food, to provide them with protection from the American criminal classes, and to ensure that the Braceros were treated no differently than any other workers in the United States. This last meant they were not to be forcibly segregated or treated as if they were somehow less deserving of human respect than any citizen of the United States. These agreements were an American promise that the Braceros were to be treated as equals in law by those who employed them. Mexico, however, refused to recognize that these conditions could be achieved within the State of Texas. Its refusal to allow Mexican citizens to bind themselves with contracts that were to be satisfied within the State of Texas was unconditional.

There were other problems with the Bracero Program that would eventually lead to abusive policies that guaranteed a future of tension between peoples, just as they signaled the eventual corruption between nations that would soon evolve into the irresponsible and unfair contempt adopted by American stakeholders who were possessed of only one goal, one abiding desire: to force Mexico to give up its labor force without those conditions required for the pursuit of human dignity that Mexico insisted upon. The tactics of government made this goal necessary, whether intended or not. The United States had unfairly placed the burden of border incursion control on the Mexican government, a tactic that allowed the U.S. to ignore the illegal conditions imposed by those corporations that benefited the most from the imposition of abuses that had already incensed the government of Mexico. By simply complaining that the contracts were improperly applied, Americans could declare that those crossing the border to the north in support of those contracts were doing so illegally, crossing a line in the sand that was "supposed" to be controlled by Mexico. The primary stakeholders -- a group that included the nation’s largest growers, farm lobbying groups, and the congressional farm bloc -- had determined for themselves how best to take advantage of the Bracero Program. More importantly, insofar as the conduct of America's agricultural gentry was concerned, those same stakeholders had already determined that continued abuses of the Bracero Program also increased their profits.

Responsibiliy for those abuses rested to some extent with the American Immigration and Naturalization Service, which interpreted the Bracero Program in terms appropriate to its own interests. In other words, the most significant response to border incursion recognized by the Immigration and Naturalization Service represented an American immigration policy that required no interference with a status quo that was typified by abuse. As such, it provided for accurate records of migrant workers under contract through the Bracero Program while tending to ignore everything else. While this practice encouraged illegal border crossings, it was hardly the most injurious aspect of this policy. The worst problem was a result of America's insistence that Mexico police the border alone without American consideration. This ensured that the "accurate records of migrant workers under contract through the Bracero Program" mentioned above was accurate only when American-Mexican borders were crossed from Mexico into the United States. All of that emphasis that was being placed on Mexico as the controlling "partner" in this fraudulent excuse for an international relationship meant that nobody north of the border cared much about those Braceros who chose to accept additional work, thereby allowing them to remain in the United States working contract to contract, or who simply remained in America after their contracts were fulfilled. They certainly didn't care enough to count them, such a small task, one would think. By ignoring that small task, however, those with the responsibility to do otherwise ensured that the number of migrant workers crossing the border from the United States into Mexico was woefully underestimated and ensured that the Immigration and Naturalization Service could not possibly respond in any dutiful way to the mandate that its very existence demanded: that policy must sensibly meet the challenges imposed upon it by America's refusal to give necessary attention to its own system of national borders.

Over 4-million Mexicans were ultimately allowed into the United States by the time the Bracero Program was shut down. By adopting an immigration policy that commanded the legal and unfettered access of contracted Braceros into the United States, the Immigration and Naturalization Service was symbolically and objectively ignoring the need for a secure border. It should be noted that this was accomplished with a significant measure of irony, given that the migrant workers under contract had nothing whatsoever to do with immigration or naturalization.


The Bracero Program ultimately fostered
the admittance of over 4-million laborers
What the United States had managed to accomplish was technically well beyond the obese bravado these activities ultimately came to represent. Mexico had been forced to assume most of the responsibility for the the management of migrant workers, even those who crossed the border illegally, while American immigration and border policy consisted primarily of negotiating contracts with Braceros seeking what was intended to be temporary employment in America, a practice followed almost immediately by the nation's endemic willingness to ignore those contracts. Insofar as this interpretation of an immigration policy developed on the fly goes, any measurable benefits ultimately came to rest within the United States alone. It sure as Hell wasn't doing anybody else any good.

Unfortunately, life tends to be far more complex than the simple black and white character of an isolated policy normally suggests. In this case, the Immigration and Naturalization Service had instituted a policy that tended to ignore the much wider view framed within the context of American labor policy, a conclusive mistake not applied by other interest-groups and stakeholders such as the nation’s largest growers and farm lobbying groups, the congressional farm bloc, various government officials, and organized labor. For them, the Bracero Program very clearly represented labor policy, not immigration policy. And in the context of labor policy, there were some very definite problems.

The 1947 Taft-Hartley Act specifically excluded agricultural workers from the bargaining advantage that U.S. labor enjoyed and employed everywhere else. The intent was to maintain a status quo favorable to U.S. interests; and U.S. interests clearly insisted on cheap labor, even at the cost of employing illegal migrant workers. This was not much of an effort in the long run. The American Immigration and Naturalization Service simply redefined the issues. Whenever uncontracted and therefore undocumented migrant workers were discovered, they were immediately placed under arrest, processed under a legal system that provided the documentation necessary to negotiate a contract, and then paroled to growers who trucked them to cotton and beet fields in New Mexico and elsewhere where those same contracts were promptly ignored. Again. The process was called “drying out the wetbacks,” and its frequent use in the late 1940s and early 1950s ensured that the available stock of Bracero labor was capable of being expanded by the number of illegal workers apprehended on the United States' side of the border. Illegal migrant workers were essentially dropped into an environment that required cheap labor and allowed to stay as long as they continued to work for the slave wages they were ultimately forced to accept. The United States Congress -- with both chambers controlled by Republicans for the first time since 1931 -- had legislatively created a system that would have been illegal had it been applied against American workers.

Congress, of course, justified its legalization of slave rental by declaring a labor emergency brought about by America's post-war foreign policy. That policy essentially made the United States the primary stakeholder responsible for rebuilding Europe after World War Two. It's difficult to believe that any other nation could have possibly achieved what America had resolved to accomplish within the relatively short amount of time that a new and stable world economy required. That status, however, is hardly relevant to those opposing the new policy, especially that one aspect many Americans considered too great a sacrifice to accomplish: the feeding of those millions who had survived the devastation brought to Europe by the single most destructive war in world history. The better interests of migrant farm workers from Mexico was a price that few people gave any thought to. It was particularly unfortunate that the leadership of the Republican majority that would later convince President Harry Truman to dub the 1948 U.S. Legislature the "Do Nothing Congress" simply didn't believe Mexican citizens were important enough to worry about. More to the point, Republicans were far more concerned with using America's foreign policy to get rich, not to solve problems with border control and labor policy, and employing the cheapest labor possible is a tried and true means of doing exactly that. If America was going to feed all of Europe, it's agricultural interests would necessarily become the center of attention for the entire world. If a Republican-led Congress could prevent the unions from organizing the labor force and its potential within the agricultural industry, a great deal of money could be made by those funneling the resulting profits into their own bank accounts. Any examination of America's health care, insurance, and pharmaceutical industries today proves that the G.O.P. has changed very little over the decades. They still want to increase their own worth, and they still don't give a damn how many lives they destroy in the process.

As for the Braceros that had been picked up at the border by Patient-X, they have become something of a mystery. It's known that they were picked up at the border by Patient-X, because border police watched it happen, and in 1947, everything was logged down, including this pick-up of 10 common laborers on the U.S. side of the border. Unfortunately, between the border and Roswell Army Base where Patient-X was later found, horribly injured and comatose, is a space of time that has become little more than a question mark, a blank spot in history, part of that haunting Dead Zone occupied by Patient-X alone. That blank spot was there well before anybody else in the world had even an inkling of the revelations he would eventually reveal. Before such revelations, even the guessing game sometimes played at amongst historians and the frenetically curious was still just a game. The only thing the rest of the world had that they could bounce off of for inspiration was a sad couple of negatives: no one ever reported seeing those Braceros in America ever again, and not a single one of them ever returned south to their families. It would take another 46 years before some new information could be applied to those insanely cold cases, and that new information would be a stunning reminder of both human cruelty and human incompetence.

It was a full month-and-a-half after Patient-X started to regain consciousness that he was able to talk well enough to be understood, but even then, his words tended to slur and he often forgot where he wanted to take his sentences, or how best to carry a thought from the back of his head to that pause of breath that his lips sometimes failed to recognize. He was all too often forced to drift among the scattered vowels and consonants populating his loss until he could start over again with a little more clarity. Because of this handicap, and it was a horrifying one nobody really wanted to recognize or witness, conversations could be difficult at times even when they were as short as a request for a little water.

Ardajio Jonas, the Veteran's Administration representative attached to the Santa Fe facility where Patient-X was trying to recover spent a lot of time with this once healthy young man who fell into unconsciousness and awakened an old and dying man of 73 years. Their very short friendship started as a show of sympathy, but Ardajio very soon came to admire the character and honesty of this odd and forgotten old man, this Rip Van Winkle of the modern age. "There was just something about him -- something that was serious and kind and without an ounce of sadness; he was thankful for simply being conscious and possessing the humble ability to communicate. How many people can you say that about? He was completely disarming; it was all very unexpected, and more than a little sad. He was well aware that his time was running out, and that is a curse many men would have held inside, letting it fester and turn into the worst kind of unreasonable anger. But that just wasn't in him. He had a smile for every thought in the day. And I've never met a man who was so genuinely thankful to God for granting him one more day to fill up with conversation. If truth be told, that was my only real reason for spending so much time with him. I didn't have to be there. Hell, I was VA and he weren't no veteran. He could make you feel good for breathin' though. Thankful. An' that's a truly rare gift."

Jonas spent some weeks discussing the past 46 years with Patient-X, but the entire time the VA rep could not help but notice that there was sometimes an odd disinterest evident in the patient's broad demeanor the closer the subject of those discussions came to the present day. It was as evident a structure of the man's personality as that terrifying coma once was. It seemed to Jonas that the further back in time these discussions eventually came to center on, the more attentive Patient-X was, and the more urgent his expressions became. There was something missing in his history, something that was making it difficult for him to recenter himself into his newly awakened state. These were strange suppositions for a man like Jonas to face down. After all, he was an administrator at best; he simply wasn't equipped to analyze the environment and the weathering of another man's mind. On the other hand, the fact that he was unable to define in any convincing way the mysteries he was now facing didn't make them any less possessive of his thoughts when he was ultimately left to his own memories and conditions and human flaws. More importantly, Jonas wasn't the only person to notice this apparently historical defect to the newly awakened soul, nor the hollow inattentiveness that normally billowed like gentle yet aggressive furnitures crumbling with near disinterest on the far side of the older man's memory. "Hell, I'm not exactly the brightest spoon in the drawer, so I'm pretty sure I wasn't the first one in that hospital to notice what was going on. I don't know exactly who saw it first, but I'm pretty certain they had nothin' to do with me."

It was the doctors, of course. Once they recognized the possibilities inherent to the near daily conversations between Jonas and Patient-X, they realized that this might represent their best means of keeping their patient alive. The self-assessment effect has long been recognized as a possible tool for the treatment of long-term coma patients who have spent years in the minimally conscious state so many fail to recover from. The self-assessment doctrine tends to force those applying it to maintain the newly awakened concentration on their own mentality and its effect on any physical changes such concentration may in fact be responsible for. On the other hand, the existence of any newly awakened consciousness, particularly one that has been quiet and unused for such a long period of time is extremely rare, so doctors are forced to rely on a whole lot of theory surrounded by a tissue's worth of conversation. In addition, self-assessment is a difficult task to apply when the condition of the patient's memory is largely unknown. It is even more pronounced when the patient's musculature and internal organs have been largely unused to any significant extent. Nonetheless, the rarity of the phenomenon is still the greatest handicap to work through, especially when consciousness has been given free reign over the subtle monsters of man's lazy incontinence. The rarity of the issues ensures that we can never have enough data to properly predict with any real confidence how one particular individual is going to react to whatever changes to his environment that we determine to introduce for whatever medical reasons we're trying to work through. Without that knowledge-based confidence to rely on, we're forced to contend with a lot of guesswork. If your patient is so close to death that even the slightest change in treatment can toss him back into a coma, or even kill him outright, guesswork can be murder for medical personnel to work through; sometimes, depending upon one's point of view, that can be the literal truth.

In the case of Patient-X, self-assessment was difficult to confirm, primarily because nobody knew the point where an accurate memory might give way to fantasy. Some doctors were convinced that forcing the patient to experience events that could not be confirmed as actual history might not only force the patient to rely on false memories as emotive portals into a possibly inaccurate or conditional field of remembrance, it could even promote a firm suspicion of internal doubt so great as to suspend the patient's belief. And belief is a powerful thing, particularly so in such an uncertain arena as the mind of a man in his 70's with the neuron tracks of a man in his 20's.

Post-comatic mentality is rarely strong enough to overcome the stress normally expected to accompany even the partial erasure of one's temporal foundation, and when that happens in a patient whose mind has already failed at least once to recover from a happenstance that would very likely kill any other man in the entire world -- and, yes, statistically that is exactly the horror that has already become an ingrained and sculpted facet of such a man's defined humanity -- the very real threat of almost certain rejection of self is every bit as threatening to the newly awakened after the expense of such time as a bullet to the head. In any case, that was the fear. There has simply never been a sample group large enough to inspire confidence in our medical expectations.

The doctors had noticed that most of the conversations between their patient and Ardajio Jonas were primarily one-sided narratives meant to address the patient's ignorance of his many years of silence passed but not experienced. These discussions lacked the experiential factors that recovery patients needed the most. In the same method of unconscious recovery from illness used by patients under conditions imposed by the placebo effect, the unconscious affirmations of one's own history can often -- relative, of course, to the significantly small dataset researchers are forced to contend with -- provide the foundation of one's identity necessary for the maintenance of a secure and healthy mentality. As we often see when the placebo effect comes into play, a healthy body can be the unexpected bounty of conditions imposed upon the mind. Unfortunately, in the case of recovering coma patients, the opposite can sometimes prove detrimental to that recovery, and that was something Patient-X's doctors sincerely wanted to avoid.

The staff eventually broached the subject with Jonas, explaining that any interest the patient showed in the events surrounding the accident that had brought him to this evident impasse in his life could possibly be a great benefit to the healing process. Of course, they recognized as well that any detailed examination of the subject would probably have to be initiated by the patient himself. "This was just in case," as they put it. His constitution, being so weak, might not breathe the still air favorably if his attentions were to be forced into a laser beam of well-focused confrontation his mind had no desire to wander upon. A man's memories leave a kind of red hot branding on his personality that all too often can't be predicted. Often, men simply refuse to examine themselves at the depths necessary for the catalyst of a psychological breakthrough to occur, and when that man can only discuss 26 years and a few months out of his 73-year lifespan, there's very little that can be predicted. He was, after all, dying and had been for 46-years. It would be cruel to force him to relive anything, let alone the accident of his life that took those 46-years away. It's a fickle fate, however, that measures the benefits that are possible when those affirmations are confronted. And as we've already noted, when you're addressing issues involving those recovering from a long term comatic state, it's impossible not to guess a lot.

The parallel indices that we use to define our place in time are not often so completely isolated as those that fate spun and braided for Patient-X. Whereas one man's lifeline would naturally break and bend as it applied recognizably common interactions with the lives of other men, the lone character of one man's 46-years of silent communion within a universe he was to all outward assurances unaware of might very well appear to us as part of our environment, like a forest or the blasted torrid furnace of a desert, something to encounter without any expectations of communal response. It was already apparent that Patient-X had been violently uprooted and tossed like a sauce-pot by an otherwise unaware God into a quiet world of imposed nonexistence for 46 barely endurable years. To suggest that this had been accomplished merely to allow the present to catch up with the future until another man's story might first develop of its own accord before being granted leave to cross paths with the secret void represented in the heart of the comatose man would seem intemperate even to the least aware amongst us. After all, Patient-X was clearly a man composed of little more than beginnings and endings, a man lacking almost entirely both the substance and the superficial of a normal man's livelier years.

For a much younger man named Roger Craggett, the story was entirely different ...

Craggett, you see, had been adopted as an infant by a quiet, lonely couple already in their fifties when they decided to enlarge their family. He had been told throughout his childhood that he was born in a small town outside of St. Louis, Missouri before being wrapped up in the ancient love of a couple of well-intentioned and well-doctrinated Episcopalians who eventually grew eager to settle in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Their plans originally required them to move south into Texas. Those plans fell apart, however. They discovered that it was impossible for them to relax is such an environment. They lived there for less than two months, leaving only upon discovering for themselves how uncomfortable the people made them feel. To be fair, they had only spent a couple of weeks in Houston, and a little over a month in El Paso, but they had always maintained that those couple of months were entirely sufficient. Any longer, they insisted, would have been verging on the excessive, and they had always believed that good and fair opinions should be based on as much data as possible, while critical opinions must be based on as little real data as necessary. The Craggetts very firmly believed that the centerpiece of a man's better nature must be so significant as to eviscerate doubt, while a man's faults and the harsh features of his personality must be assumed in order to force those inclined to venerate their leaders to raise the value of their expectations. Roger, of course, had a very difficult childhood, but only before he had finally determined that men could never be trusted. On those rare occasions when trust, appreciation, and sometimes even nobility became apparent, it was best not to discuss such opinions with his parents, convinced as they were that idolatry was at all times a grievous and disappointing character flaw that should be rooted out from the hearts of even the best of men. Young Craggett learned at an unfortunately early age that whenever his thoughts of other men encompassed feverish doctrines such as horror and contempt, such opinions were almost always much easier to discuss and defend.

These quiet yet outspoken qualities he was forced to examine in his youth ensured Craggett's complete and utter ignorance about his own beginnings in life. Insofar as his abilities could be measured and applied, he became entirely skeptical that anything of real use would eventually pop up as he embraced his future as well, a certainty that guaranteed he would know even less about his endings than most men come to expect. After having abandoned himself to his livelier years long ago, it was perhaps appropriate that the connective disorder fate had almost maliciously reserved for these two very unique men would require many years of incubation for each before the possibility that such an intense crosswinding of opposing forces could bear real fruit. For Patient-X, 46-years had been reserved then set aside as useless merely to provide the mental acclimation necessary to create an eventual foil for Craggett's intimate and thereby inconsistent rages, the sources of which lay somewhere in the past, albeit undefined and resistent to all examination. Was fate cruel? Perhaps ... It is far more likely, however, that fate had merely thrown instances of time together without approbation or cause. Any cruelty the universe may have been stoking up between these two personalities had already occurred and the wages of misfortune that may have been earned as a result had already been spent and accounted for.


"Flying Saucers piss me off!"
The primary result of the invasive conditioning that Craggett fell victim to, even when ignorance of the other players in our drama had been carefully implanted by the mute wisdom of time, would have been as clear as glass had anyone been inclined to look for it. Roger Craggett's livelier years had created the impetus, one protected to some extent by the arrogance of personal certainty, to retreat with disgust from all things -- even those elements discovered within the contours of his own life -- that were improperly defined, supported only by conjecture, discussion, or the attentions of curious nature, and offering no revelations or allowing even the simplest of conclusions to be reached by any stillborn application of logic. This overmanaged disgust had a very real psychological effect on the man's character, albeit one that could only be detected as an aspect of conversation refined by opinion. Over the course of decades, he had learned very well the singularity most consistent within a world of mad ambiiton and resolute science that was populated primarily by the ignorant and the poorly educated. When curiosity and character unexpectedly meet at the crossroads between faith and fantasy, the result, at least for Craggett, was always a fever of grave contempt. It reflects the impatience of a man who questions everything, but demands an explanation that holds up in the midst of both violent conjecture and well-harbored ridicule. It lights up an emotional outburst of arrogance that's often governed by the skepticism of late bloomers surrounded by petty and ignorant paragraph pushers in a field of well-publicized nonsense.

All of which explains why most of central New Mexico knows exactly who you're making fun of when you shake your head violently, hunch your shoulders and say in a cracked and hate-filled voice, "flying saucers piss me off!"

Thus ends our Part One...

This work is the culmination of The Saucerologist's most complex and lengthy investigation to date. As a result, the necessity for travelling throughout the States of New Mexico, Maryland, Georgia, and Utah to conduct interviews and to access numerous archives of personal records has increased significantly the expenses and time required to complete the task. While it's true that we would prefer not to incur such a taxing condition, we would nonetheless be far more dissatisfied were we to ignore such obstacles that fate has placed before us. Now before our constant readers get their little tillies in a willy that oh, bother! pooh bear's gonna ask us for a contribution to keep the meryl streep weepers sweeping, rest assured, nothing of the sort will ever happen at The Saucerologist. The only contribution that was ever provided us was immediately turned over to another website entirely -- one that we have no control over and no honest means to politicize for good or for ungood. That website advocates for the immediate colonization of the moon by crooked gangs of communist engineers on the close side and NAZI Frigidaire repairbots on the dark side. Then you hide a bunch of various weapons such as big sticks with nails protruding out on one side or handguns without any ammunition or pumice stones made of steel wool all over the place, plant a huge pile of wireless video cameras tuned to a single frequency and then wait for the fireworks to blow and the subscriptions to roll in. We think it's the most phantastical money making mirage we've never seen and can't wait to get it out of the boardroom, and onto the pay-per-view. No, we only mention the expense so our constant readers will understand the daily sacrifices we make on their behalf, and grow to appreciate our insincerity just a little bit more than yesterday or the day before. So please, remember and tell your sugar daddies and boogie uncles that ...

Part Two will be published right here in a bit of time measured out by clockwatchers in steps of quality found at the end of grace! And always remember:

This is a Saucer Press International Publication

Friday, November 4, 2016

So Now this Screwy Alien Wants Your Family Shot Dead Because You Voted

Thanks! Now This Creepy Maniac Packs a Flame-thrower in One Tiny Hand & an Axe in the Other!

The only sweet spot around this train wreck you've created is the indisputable fact that if he's elected President, he's going to debase and humiliate your family first, because you'll be the first in line; with a little bit of luck, that old alien's going to make you watch him so you'll understand the true value of your blatant and irresponsible stupidity. 


Step 5 in my "5-Step Program to Make America Great Again" is exactly what America is giving me to rule over them. I get incredibly, even grossly, wealthier. I'm given the opportunity to expand my power, my wealth, my personality, and my basic Trumpness to the rest of the world, and I won't have to be publicly subservient to the federal cattle cage to do it. That means my taxes disappear, my legal pains disappear, and my choices grow to such an expansive degree that laws will become fundamentally non-existent for me and for those I decide should grow with me. Because that's what America is all about. I won't have to worry about offering up a few friendly little confessions on some Billy Bush bus trip to Nowheresville, and I won't have to worry about 12 screwy dame prostitutes who have the balls to attempt to break my campaign. I'll just reach out and grab some pussy, and I'll do it during a goddamn press conference if I want to. And the entire planet will know that I'm the most powerful creature in the world, and wherever I choose to piss will become marked as my territory, just like the women I take to my bed. And I promise you folks, I can piss a bucket full whenever I want, because I have a great Trump bladder that pushes piss out of a great Trump dick. And things will always be great for me, and America will always be great, because I will always be great. You want to make America great again, you need to understand that where Trump's greatness goes, America follows. It's the same formula that Caesar used in ancient Rome. It's the same formula that the Czars Ivan the Terrible and Peter the Great used. It's the same formula used by every effective ruler this planet has ever been witness to. And it works! When they were great, the nations they ruled became great. Everything became better than it was, and that's a conclusion that simply can't be denied; it's history. Look, I know more than anybody else that there's a limit to what money can buy, but those with money never see that limit, because it is such a high bar to get over that it might as well be nonexistent. It's beautiful, right? So ... Remember everything folks! What Trump gets, the rest of the country gets. That's right: everything. Remember it. 'Cause it might go bye-bye. You never know, right? Right. You can never know.

Good job America! Thanks a lot Republicans. Now he's gonna stick around forever like some freaky kind of iodine-flavored gum outta Venezuela that was originally an STD. This man is an unholy cross breed alien equipped with an experimental personality that incorporates vegetable proteins, a process that leads inexorably to a narcissistic personality disorder entwined within severe paranoia and all the qualities and all the perverse, reckless  permissiveness of a lonely, schizophrenic, alligator-like mind set that's so far above and beyond what we're used to dealing with that he easily qualifies as a unique and very violent eggplant. An eggplant full of bile and acid. He's gonna eat everything in your refrigerator and in your freezer except for those funky little no-stick popsicles, because no one eats those things when it's so cold outside, what with winter coming on, and that means those things are gonna stink up your freezer until next June.  He'll eat or toss out everything in your cabinets except for some old brown sugar that's been damp-clumped like horse manure and that nasty little macaroni that nobody except your insane cousin Rita is ever going to eat, and even she's not gonna swallow it. The stuff tends to stay hard even after boiling it so much that any other pasta derivative would turn into glue. Rita, however, likes to pull it out of her mouth all wet and just barely starting to gel up on the corners a bit and then toss it at school buses to see if any are gonna stick to the windows. Sometimes they do and sometimes they don't but they're always nasty with a tangy flavor of old sheep that doesn't give a damn where it's gonna lie down to nap except it's going to be somewhere in that old field back of the house with the gopher problem.   

The thing that bothers folks the most about you Republicans is the fact that this ridiculous candidate of yours has kidnapped and is torturing to death a Republican Party that used to have brains enough to see the shit storm heading our way. Maybe you guys see this one as well, but the fact that you publicly agree that a Trump Administration would be an unheard of disaster for America yet continue to provide support and experience to that Trump campaign suggests that you're stuck in an infinite loop wrapped up in the unexpected calamity of Stockholm Syndrome, and there has to be some kind of explanation to work through this pathetic handicap. For God's sake, find yourself a psychologist and try to fix those problems you've got before casting a vote for that obscene little prick and thereby saddling the rest of the country with four years of your bad choices

I don't want to say for the record that Republicans are stupid; that's such a rude generality and fixes no responsibility for those same bad choices you continue to hide behind. It's like poking fun at someone who has a mental defect that he or she can't overcome -- the sort of thing that men like Donald Trump find so wonderfully amusing. I can't deny, however, that you Republicans are incredibly ignorant of the situation we find ourselves currently victimized by, and that, I assure you, is truly the fault of other Republicans. You people would prefer to see your own children grow up to be the same flighty, inconsiderate, and easily manipulated fools that you are, and to ensure that, you have crippled your education systems, you have laid waste to your libraries, making them casualties of war, you have defeated your schools, and you have made your textbooks into plowshares of semi-cretinous dispute, all so your children can learn more about Adam and Eve than any paleolithic hominids anywhere on this planet, the only exceptions to this prisoners' rule being the sad and lonely cases represented by Bigfoot, Sasquatch, the Yeti, and the Abominable Fucking Snowman. You prefer to ignore the illumination that is all around you so you can teach your children that a rainbow is not an effect of such illumination in damp sunlight, but a contract between Man and God that guarantees a world-wide flood will never be used to destroy all life on earth! The dumbing down of America is your fault, because you seem to believe that "Duck Dynasty" represents a more effective education than PBS. The ignorance that America uses to justify obvious stupidity is a sin that Republicans will bear for all eternity. Even worse ... they're just fine with that. It gives them the freedom to wipe out any community anywhere in the world that doesn't accept their narrow minded approach to immortality, and that's a big problem.

Just about anyone would grasp with the hooked claws of ancient crones at the mere chance for immortality. Republicans, however, are certain that the only means allowable are those honed by slaves to Christianity, and the only true Christians, apparently, are Republicans, which means they get to decide who goes to Hell and who should be treated as if they are already there, a sad case of contemptuous frivolity that damns all men excepting those who are like-minded enough to advance the power of a man most Republicans have already condemned, but will happily resurrect and place at the head of this great nation for only one sad and disgusting reason: they would prefer advancing the odds of their nation's demise before they would vote for a woman who has mishandled her FUCKING, GOD-GIVEN EMAIL!!! It's such a petty almost harmless reason that you guys are trying to use in an effort to convince the world that Hillary Clinton is the new antichrist!

It's just email, you insulting, credulous bores! It's not like she's conspiring with a foreign nation to degrade, debase, and furiously injure the democracy we've built in this nation. Only the Republican Party pulls treasonous shit like that. It's ridiculous. It's shameful. And this fear of yours that prevents you from improving the world around you, and that influences your decisions to reject honesty, fair play, and the forthright governance of a nation that is already great is nothing short of sickening and embarrassing cowardice. If you still consider yourselves American, you should be deeply ashamed, because you've become a Party of criminals and thugs. Your primary tactics involve frightening people to prevent them from voting; making it difficult for the people you oppose to vote; using blatantly illegal methods to cheat yourselves to victory when that is the only way you can possibly bring about the election results that you prefer. You're not Americans. You're nothing but a crowded bar full of fucking animals who have determined that their pathetic, diseased candidate is a better animal than the human woman he is running against -- a woman who mishandled her email!! The fact that you believe this crappy little denouement is going to eventually turn wham and bam into an actual indictment would be hilarious if it wasn't for the fact that you pissants believe it to be true!

The plain fact is that most people in government know very little about how best to preserve and manage email records. The brouhaha raised by you irresponsible Republicans has forced the matter into debate and resulted in new procedures throughout the government to ensure these records are properly maintained.  It's a function of archival application that is not very well understood at all levels. To try and turn this matter into a means of denigration by coloring it with criminal content is simply stupid. There's no other word for it -- it's a pathetic, useless, and ultimately dishonest attempt to suggest criminality where criminality has never had reason to go. This failure of leadership, however, is a failure shared by the Republican Party. Ask yourself why, after all the years of email use and the establishment of America's archival needs, President Obama is the first President to demand an accessible, automated, electronic method be provided for the classification and retention of email records. George W. Bush certainly never gave such an order, which is one of the reasons that it was so easy for Wikileaks to release nearly 400,000 documents detailing how poorly America prosecuted that insane party in Iraq. This was the largest criminal leak of classified files in world history, and not one of you clowns thought to reassess our electronic files protocol to prevent it from happening again. You decided the next President would have to do it, because Republicans simply don't know how to govern, while placing the needs of the party above the needs of the nation. This is a practice well-honed in Communist nations, as any half-witted historian could tell you, but before now, it has been anathema to American democracy! But then you guys suddenly felt inspired by the grief of a losing team. 

The whole world is now aware that the Republican Party protects its own interests before those interests of our nation. We know this is an absolute fact, because the Republican Party are co-conspirators with the government of Russia to win the current election, a fact well-known, because some of you -- such as Rudy Giuliani -- have actually been crowing over this small matter of treason on nationwide television! You are such pathetic losers that you have become willing agents of a foreign nation! You should probably just shut up and think about that for a couple of decades, because as you stand now, you are the ugliest of Americans in our shared history, even past the extent of our darkest nightmares.

Before President Obama's mandate, email records were defined as government files on the basis of content alone. Personal records and conversations that did not have a standard government use were not considered to be government records, and those that were considered to be government records could be retained by printing out a hard copy of the document and putting it into document storage. What was considered a government document due to content was very often determined by the classification of the file, which still requires markings indicating the classification at the top of the file. And at that time, very few government employees -- both Republican and Democrat -- determined classification by reading the entire document; it simply takes too much time when you have thousands of such documents. How long does it take you to read a single page? Now multiply that by tens of thousands. And the FBI admitted outright that many of the documents Secretary Clinton failed to pass into archival hands were not properly marked. And those that were marked are remarkably easy to push aside for someone who is busy trying to be an effective Secretary of State -- which she was.

Was it a violation of protocol? Yes. Absolutely. Was it a crime? Hell, no -- it never even came close to being a crime, because a crime doesn't exist without criminal intent This is precisely why the FBI insisted that there could be no prosecution. It would be interesting to look at the records of Republican Congressmen during the same period to see how many of their records were also treated improperly, but not one of you cretins has ever suggested that such a tactical approach be adopted. And yet, you believe you possess the ability to make a balanced decision and to reach a fair conclusion even though you know absolutely nothing about either side of the argument! The arrogance and the putrid insistence that you understand anything when the opposite is so plain and clear is so beyond what your political Party used to believe that today even the worst slanders imagineable have become typical tools of your oppressive nature as Americans.

This isn't at all surprising. The Republican Party has always tried to color its opponents with such disrepute because doing so takes the nation's focus off of its own tactical practice of government -- a practice that puts party above the needs of the nation. The Republican Congress during the past 8-years has not had a better America among its goals. Its only goal was to prevent anything that President Obama wanted to accomplish from even being debated. As a result, they have gone down in history as the most unaccomplished Congress ever. You never wanted to govern. You wanted to prevent government, because a black President was living in the White House!  And yet, without any assistance from Congress at all, President Obama still managed to repair the disaster our economy had become in the hands of a Republican President! Today the economy is far better than it was in the hands of President George W. Bush, and the number of jobs created has been rising steadily for 8-years! 

You never even noticed, did you? You certainly never discussed it. You complain about illegal aliens, yet you repeatedly fail to even debate the issue on the Congressional floor. If illegal aliens bother you so much, why haven't you attempted to legislate the issue as a proper government should? You complain about amnesty, something Ronald Reagan supported, but you don't introduce any ideas of your own, or suggest ways to fix the problem. You have to discuss an issue in Congress before you can create a law to control it, but the Republicans have refused outright to discuss anything except how best to foil the evil machinations of a Democrat President. Frankly, it's disgusting and irresponsible policy to do nothing just in case something the President wants to implement squeaks through your fat little greasy fingers. 

If you want to know why the economy isn't as robust as you'd like to see it, take a close look at what your fucking Republican Congress has managed to accomplish since the people of this nation elected President Obama! You've accomplished nothing, because you have tried to do nothing except to prevent government from functioning.  Now you're unhappy with the state of the nation? You're the cause of the state of the nation! And yet, even without any consideration at all from the Republican Congress, Democrats still managed to take us out of the worst economic crisis this country has been the victim of since the Great Depression! And a lot more could have been accomplished if Republicans had wanted to do something more than complain and whine about the black man in the White House! The way you center blame on people who have had the guts and the moral desire to manage a responsive American leadership is frankly sickening! You want to blame somebody for the ugliness that's now become typical of your Party, try looking at your fucking Party! Improvements only occur when there is a will to improve, but the only thing you arrogant little pricks have had the will to accomplish is the unity necessary to hold the entire government of the United States hostage until your hunger for another disastrous, Republican Presidency could be satisfied! Well, fuck you! There happens to be a lot of people in this country that want things to improve, that want a responsive Congress instead of another Republican aristocracy that judges its own self-worth by how little they can actually accomplish for the world and for America! And by God, if you idiots are going to continue doing absolutely nothing until you're given the power to sink this nation once again into another Great Depression or another meaningless and irresponsible war, then you are going to eventually lose everything to the Democrats, Congress included! You don't win friends or votes by sitting back and doing nothing until you get your way! That's a rule of life you idiots should have learned as children, and the fact that you didn't speaks volumes to the rest of the world, your own nation included.

You people represent a complete waste of your God-given lives, and you should consider taking off a few years so you can grow the fuck up instead of taking the rest of the world down with you. You're a bunch of pathetic whining little bitches who have dedicated yourselves to stealing all of the toys that don't even belong to you and going home in a huff, weeping that if you can't play by the rules you reinvent as you go along, then nobody is going to be allowed to play. Unfortunately, you forget that this isn't a goddamn game; it's a real planet populated with real people, and there are a lot of different ways to destroy it, so you should probably get used to cooperating with all of those other people that also populate this planet -- and you should probably try to remember that it's their planet just as much as it is yours.

And guess what? Threatening to refuse the approval of Supreme Court justices until you get your way is just one more scrap of idiocy that an America government will eventually have to use when we kick your ass out of government entirely. Don't you ever wonder why children picking teams at play always pick the whiny little farts last? Because even children understand that you assholes are completely worthless.

You're right, of course; all of these qualities you seem to bestow upon each other with great pride and irritation in equal measure will generally never be brought together to serve as the best goddamn excuse available to convince other Republicans that this is why they deserve eternal damnation. This is, of course, all true, but only because Republicans seem overly confident that they're going to Heaven to celebrate the fourth of July with Jesus Christ himself! That is part of what the rest of America doesn't understand about you freaking idiots. So many of you are so stupidly blind and brainwashed that you believe you're doing something good! Your own actions and arguments have convinced the entire rest of the world (which is so much bigger than you seem to think it is) that Republicans, as we've delineated so often, are -- simply put -- not a very intelligent group of fools and troublemakers. After all, you can argue for months as to whether or not you supported the war with Iraq that the last Republican President thrust his sorry nation into, an attitude and point-of-view apparently based on the opinion that if you agreed with the policies advanced by the LAST Republican President, you are incapable of serving your nation as the NEXT Republican President. This opinion is so ingrained into your pathetic consciousness that the power-mad demagogue you are preparing yourselves to elect is willing to deny such claims of support even as recordings of himself claiming the very opposite play across the television screen beside him. And yet, you people are so stupid -- sorry, I meant ignorant -- that you still BELIEVE him!

Typically, you people wander about the nation howling an oddly cumulative chorus intended to give yourselves the courage necessary to willingly separate yourselves from the Republicans of Lincoln and even Reagan while holding those two examples of the opposing vectors of your belief in the highest of esteem. You reject the very ideal of a strong federal government which has already been paid for with the blood of an American Civil War that was championed and worshiped by that greatest of founding Republicans:  Abraham Lincoln -- the inventor of executive war powers and dictatorial federal standards that modern Republicans so strongly detest. You have become little more than strange, annoying animals united in your hatred for all things descended from the fruits of dignity and respect. 

You even go so far as to call yourselves American Christians, but nonetheless deny without the slightest measure of thought the lowest standards of health care for other Americans. That whole "do unto others" thing? Garbage. You tools of hypocrisy have twisted your denial of Reagan and Lincoln into a denial of all things intended to carry man past the threshold of his suffering and into a universe free of pain. Then you laugh and insist that pain is good for the health of a man's soul and it doesn't cost him a cent! Oh, yeah, as if you possess the knowledge and spirit necessary to adjudicate what is good for others. The American Christian of the 21st century is best known by your inherent willingness to deny others those things that grant comfort and peace to yourselves, with maybe a little to your family. Things like health care. Freedom from pain. Those conditions that enable man to step away from his own sheltered misery and do something for someone else for a change without complaining about it the next day. Something of real value. Something like health care! 

If you stopped there it would be bad enough, but you never stop anywhere. You slander others without care. You conspire with the leadership of other nations. You arrogantly demean and insult the network of alliances that we have developed and that has meant so much and worked so well and so tirelessly that we can honestly conclude that without those allies, the Cold War would still be ongoing and and would still be a threat to every nation, not just those who are members of NATO. You are even waging a pitiless war on your own wives, your mothers, your sisters, and your daughters and you do so with the insults and egregiously sorrowful attitudes you take home to your family every night you come home without first climbing into bed with your next wife, your next secretary, your next ticket to contempt.

I'm not at all surprised, just saddened. The suffering of others means nothing to you so long as your own freedom from want and desire can be defined and maintained within the structures of your own familial waste, and to Hell with the rest of the nation! Why should you and your leadership refine any of the care that might be available for others? What point would there be to a nation of healthy men and women when the One Great Organizing Will throughout the universe, the Forever True magician you refer to as Jesus Christ, will very soon destroy the world and everything in it to bring about a thousand years of God's Kingdom of Glory and Power and Freedom from want. What good is there in universal health care when the Apocalypse grinds all men into raw grain for God's own dietary oppression? When the Rapture spins the world on a wheel and physically rips those good souls from out of the storms of your God's own intent, universal health care, by definition, becomes a waste of time and money. 

It's unfortunate for those who consider themselves to be good men of hearty Christian stock still waiting for the Rapture, that clarion call of Christ, but I have it on damn good authority that the Rapture came and went ten years ago, and not one of you self-righteous bigots of the black book even noticed it happen, because not a single man amongst your millions was considered worthy enough in God's eyes to be carried away in a blink! And yet you little crowds of self-polluting Republicans still insist that before you die, God will make Himself known and finally carry you all away to the good place, the world of warm hearths, and the sunny lands. Well that train came and went a long time ago, pal, so go home and tell your family that you have all been judged and found to be worthless. Whether you feel love for others is simply not relevant if you fail to show it. And when the enemies of everything good and pure in the world made themselves known to you silly, selfish Republicans, you stood in a line behind him waiting for your marching orders. You aren't merely sinners; you're actively empowering sin across the nation, and very likely the world! The rest of America salutes you as the greedy, irresponsible shits you have truly become under the alleged leadership of this creepy little maniac you're trying to put in the White House.

So once again, thank you! You have writ large your own damnation, and it's all very white and Christian of you, I'm sure. Whatever it is that you irresponsible and unmerciful fools are trying to do to our country needs to be parked away and allowed to die a meek and lonely death that will never in a million years be mourned by actual human beings who are trying to accomplish important things for the benefit of humanity. These are things that you cowards lack the courage and the will to even attempt to describe, not even for the sake of your own children! 

That's right. Some of us have decent and useful dreams for America, so kindly do us all a favor and hurry up and finish your one way trip to Hell, because you're taking way too much time away from an entire world's worth of Americans who still believe it's possible to effectively and fairly govern this great nation. So please take your ugly billionaires away. America doesn't want them, and the world doesn't need them. For the most part, they have proven themselves useless, just as your Party has. Kindly leave our nation alone, and quit playing with it like petulant children, because if you don't break it first, you're sure as Hell going to make it dirtier and nastier and in need of a brisk cleaning before real humans can finally use it again.

This is a Saucer Press International Publication