Tuesday, May 24, 2016

The Precious Creed

When is a Universe Not a Universe?

When It's a Hoax . . .

SPI Atlanta, Georgia -- It occurred to one of our stringers that we've never published our principle creed here at The Saucerologist. It's been published on a couple of other websites, but never on our own.  We would like to remedy that oversight today with the following epistle to our faithless few:

Here at The Saucerologist, our philosophy is simple: we are convinced that Humanity is a hoax perpetrated by the Alien Grays of Zeta Reticuli. Their recently consummated alliance with Schrodinger's Cat throughout the known multiverse has made the eventual adoption of the Alien Gray's worldview a near certainty. When this occurs, the hoax will end, and the imaginary creatures currently populating this imaginary planet we call "Earth" will fade away into nothingness, as if they had never been. This will be an instantaneous and aggressive change resulting from the overwhelming reversal of the belief system our planet currently occupies. 

Ditto for the planet itself.  
Map revealing the source of our possible extinction
(Courtesy Saint Betty Hill of the Hills)

And you guys thought belief could never affect the balance of our reality structures. Well, this one was created when wet matter blew like a river into the Universe as the first known quasar erupted for absolutely no reason at all.

Damn right it sucks . . .

The Saucerologist has decided that enough is enough. We happen to enjoy our current existence, even if we are mere theories intended to support the imaginary renderings of an alien race. Their ultimate intent is to acquire great power and force its collective will to prevail across millions of universes, many of which are also populated with imaginary beings equally dissatisfied with their imaginary lot in life.

Being imaginary creatures invented primarily as a source of entertainment for alien hordes, we possess only one effective weapon that can be raised in defense of our existential happenstance. That weapon is our own imagination. We seek, therefore, to unburden our dark souls so that we may properly wield that great and often offensive weapon to achieve the only worthwhile solution we can see to our innate problem of ultimate extinction: our continued existence in this singular universe that we have affectionately called "The Universe", where we hope to survive in friendly commerce across the face of this great planet that we have affectionately called "Earth". To that end, therefore, we pledge ourselves, our lands, our properties, and our admittedly weak and poorly focused will to the attainment of our primary desire, this being the creation of an alternate worldview raised in turn by the imaginary inhabitants of our imaginary universe mustered by we imaginary few to replace the Alien Gray's worldview that is collectively threatening our very existence, imaginary though it may be.

So remember: if you stop by our little blog and truly believe what you read (or at least try to), you may yet extend your actuality, your essence, the physicality of your currently weightless and immeasurable soul for a short time (to be determined at some future date dependent upon whatever efforts you actually apply). For if you do not, the Gray Threat wins and our tenuous existence grows ever weaker.

Join us today at:

http://saucerologist.blogspot.com

Or you can just stay here, like I do. Not much difference . . .

For the sake of us all, please remember: only you (in concert with everybody else) can help us win this imaginary war against the ever elusive Gray Threat.

Your friend and neighbor,
Todd Rugger at The Saucerologist

This is a Saucer Press International Publication 

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